02.27.07
Al Gore and Leonardo DiCaprio
this is pretty funny what Al Gore does at the Oscars
yay, for Al Gore! it definitely has people talking!
haha armpit
so, i’m tired of beyonce and her stupid armpit pose. i was taking pictures with my cats a little bit ago and i had the most brilliant idea….take an armpit pose! haha. so, i think i have to take an armpit pose whenever i take pictures now; who, what, where, when… it doesn’t matter. beyonce doesn’t care, she’ll put her arms on the top of her head standing in the middle of a crowd, so i’m going to do it too, if i ever get the opportunity. i can see doing this pose in a professional photo-shoot but come on…at public appearances. it’s annoying as hell.
here are my first armpits poses:
excuse me for looking ugly and extremely tired
02.26.07
last night: picture surfing
last night i was home alone and i got a little bored so i decided to look at some old pictures under my mom’s bed. i’ve seen these pictures before but i noticed one and i thought “wow”
i want to look as hott as my mom was when i get to be her age in this picture. she was 29 when she had me, so i’m guessing that she is about 28 no younger than 27 in this picture. of course, the man in the picture is my dad. but i don’t really want to talk about him. i will never recover from not having a dad. I believe every child needs one. but i can’t complain too much because i have so much more then others. I just hope the best for everyone who doesn’t have a father, a mother, or both. because it hurts, it hurts deeply. I know because i don’t have a father and i don’t even know why. i don’t know why he decided that i wasn’t important enough to at least communicate with but i guess communication was just too much or maybe it was his new family. anyway, that is not the point, i just saw this picture and thought “wow”, i want to look as hott as my mom in 10 years. right now, i’m definitely not loving my looks at all and if i look like that, i sure will. A little over a month ago, i had some friends come over for a visit and one of the guys was looking at some pictures on a bookshelf and said that i look like the woman in the picture. the picture happened to be of my mom’s mom. or my grandma. so that is a start. my mom’s mom is known to be a wild one; she was definitely known for her beauty and she knew it.
i was also looking at all my soccer pictures from my last years club team because i really miss playing soccer. soccer brought nothing but joy to me but i think it was mostly the team. we all had so much fun together, even though there were a couple bitches. i’ll admit i was even a bitch a couple of times, mostly at practice because our coach is a completely and totally innocent. He was nothing but an enthusiastic soccer dad who stepped up to the plate when we had no coach and got 100 percent zero respect for his team. there were practices that i was blew up at everybody because practice consisted of giggling and doing everything half ass. i’ve been thinking about whether or not i should play soccer or not. if i do play, that means i would probably have to stay here at home and play for the college i’m going to now even though i plan has been to get out of here. i don’t think i could afford playing soccer any other way. i’m just going to have to work my ass off to get money and try to get scholarships, which it might be too late for. but then i also don’t know if i’d be able to get a spot on the team at the college i want to go for. they have an incredible record and santa rosa has the best high school soccer teams in the united states. the moral of the story is: i miss soccer or i miss soccer with good people
The Departed
yes, I totally knew that The Departed would win. I’m in love with that movie. after i saw it, i even wrote a blog about it but i don’t think that anyway can see that blog because i set it to private for security issues or whatever just read my first entry with this blog, i think i say why. Anyway, I’m the happiest person right now.
02.21.07
lucky day (kind of)
well, today i didn’t have to go to English because i’m going to make the phone to drop the class right after this. This morning i took advantage of my time and actually did some running on my treadmill and then i did a workout routine. I made myself a nice french toast breakfast. Then i was almost late for stats because i wasn’t watching the time; thankfully i made it on time because i hate walking in class late while the teacher is talking. During break for Stats class i really needed a drink of water so i got a dollar and went down to the cafe to get one but when i got there i realized that water cost more than a dollar nowaday’s so i was going to leave and then by chance i happened to look down at the coin return and somebody left 30 cents. I was pretty happy considering i needed water badly. Then at the end of class, i talked to the teacher and verified that me going to stats on tuesday’s and thursday’s doesn’t matter. that’s good! and i got a 95 percent on my stats test that was last week. the teacher said that the mean was 73.6 percent, so i’m pretty happy. now i’m not too worried about getting a “B” or worse in the class because we can use notes on the rest of the tests including the final. so , now i need to go study for a math test that i have tomorrow. i hope that i do ok. i’m a bit nervous about it.
02.20.07
Good News?
I’d say that this is good news anyway. I know in a recent post i asked myself if i should drop some units to work. While I was writing I was thinking about dropping 9 units. Fortunately today, I came up with a new idea that allows me to drop only 3 units keeping my schedule a “full load” of 12 units. the class that i would be dropping is english: critical thinking; this english class is just the standard second semester english. I figure that i can take this class anytime and i don’t think that it would be any harder anywhere else. I might have more memorizing to do at a harder school but who knows. I take this class on Monday’s and Wednesday’s with Statistics following right after. Luckily, my statistics teacher teaches on tuesday’s and thursday’s as well. At the beginning of the semester she specifically said that she doesn’t care if people switch around classes, as long as we came to class. I’m not just going to make this move, i’m going to go in and talk to her to see if i can make a permanent switch. In doing this, it will free up my Monday’s and Wednesday’s. Which now makes it easier for me to get a job and work more hours and i will now be able to work during the week instead of just friday’s and weekends. Even though i’m losing a class and units, i’m quit happy. Money is an important issue right now.
my biggest fear with this plan is my mother’s approval. when she came home late tonight. i was very pleasant (since she thinks i’m not) and i just came out and asked. and she didn’t seem to have a problem with it. of course, she lectured me a little bit about not having a job and what it be like if i dropped the class but overall she said “yes”. and my mom also reminded of another reason why i have to continue to take at least 12 units and that is my car. she bought me a new 2006 honda civic hybrid to my surprise. I know she bought it because 1) i needed a new car (the car i had was crap and she was wasting her money on it) and 2) it’s the car i wanted. i didn’t really know that she would buy me a car to be honest. she bought two summers ago and this summer happened to be a living hell for her because her her boss was trying to demote her and hired a lawyer to fight it and all that good stuff and lost a lot of money in lawyer fee’s. Luckily she didn’t get demoted. if i knew how much a hybrid car cost, i would have liked a regular car better. I honestly didn’t know the cost difference. anyway, the payment plan or something is based on the fact that i stay in school with at least 12 units a semester. health Insurance is also cheaper if i am taking a 12 unit schedule. and I also get a student discount at the health club i belong to if i take 12 units. i’m not sure if there is anything else that counts on me taking 12 units. but all of those things save money.
good luck to me getting a “first job”. the first one doens’t count, i don’t even want to talk about it. hopefully, i will be happy with my own money flowing in. i do plan to spend a little but not much. i must say, i am a girl and i have not been clothes shopping in over a year. sure i get a shirt here and there and last month i got two pairs of pants but that is because one of my aunts “mysteriously” found an abercrombie and fitch gift card for $200 in her house and she gave it to me. i have everything else that i need. clothes is the only thing on my list of things to get. I would love to go on a shopping spree in San Francisco, I’ve always gotten my clothes here or in Santa Rosa. after i get a job and work for a couple of weeks, i will make a clothes budget and set a limit to how much i can spend. that seems reasonable. hopefully this is the start of something good and hopefully i will be able to make a choice on where i want to go to school next fall semester but that is also based on if i will have roommates to move in with if i decide to go to santa rosa.
question
should i drop out of my classes this semester to work? if i do that, then i will for sure be able to move out of the house next fall semester and hopefully go to santa rosa junior college or i could just get a place in ukiah. but the problem is i don’t know anyone in either place that i could live with. i had an old friend told me that “if she could do it, i could do it” because she has been living on her own for over a year. i’m not sure but i think she took at least a semester off at school because over the summer i saw her dad and he told me she was going back to school and he seemed really excited. anyway, it is just an option that i have been thinking about. and a thing that scares is that the school that i want to go to is a gazillion times harder then the junior college that i’m going to now is, so if i drop out of my classes and end up going to the other school, i will be facing the same classes but it will be extremely more difficult. i think dropping classes is only way that i will have enough money to ever leave my house. i’m not sure if there is any other way, i really don’t know and it is driving me crazy. i know that i am really unhappy the way i am now and i don’t know what will make me happy
again tonight
my mom just said “aunty cathy has a perfectly good trailer on the property that you can move into”. that is something that just doesn’t come up in your mind on the stop or at least i don’t think so. it kind of hurts because i think that she has seriously been thinking about it and i think that she has talked my aunt about it. so if that is the way she wants it, then fine. i have no problem moving in a trailer that sits on an acre at my aunt and uncle’s house about a half hour away from everything. fine, if that is what she wants. i will email her and tell her fine, i’ll do it. i’m sure i will be much happier and there will be much less distractions then here but most importantly, i won’t be living with my mom. yes, i does make me sad and it did make me cry, i wonder if it will be worth it? will i actually be happy or will a become a depressed lonely person? i don’t know.
what
my mom is yelling at me and blowing up at me for fucking god damn reason. am i seeing a trend here? it’s always the same fucking thing. she ust blew up at me because i asked what the green stuff was on the meat i was putting in my dogs food bowl. and then i knew she was in one of her moods and i asked what was wrong and and she said my attitude. she said it hs been building up all week and today or just now she blew up. wtf? i am tired of her. i really am
