07.31.07
Confused
its haunting me. its something that i quite explain or i can i just don’t know how much i am willing to share. its something that i definitely don’t want to keep bottled up inside me, in fact- i can’t keep it a secret. i don’t want this weighing me down like a ton of bricks anymore. i want to know the whole truth and nothing but the truth. i’ve been literally waiting for months for hear what i heard, i’ve been waiting to actually feel like a person, someone worth living for. why the change? why now? that is all i ask, why now? so many things are running through my mind and i don’t know what to do. is it worth the wait and worth the pain and go through it all again or should i let myself be free. its not even gaurenteed that everything will be ok in the end. if i let it go now, will i be saved myself? fuck, i was doing well, i was moving on but then at the very last second there is always something that fucking happens.
Joshua said,
August 1, 2007 at 5:58 am
Hi Megan,
It’s been a while, I hope all is well? I usually read the posts without commenting but this one got me a little worried about you. Especially the bit that said:
“its not even guaranteed that everything will be ok in the end. if i let it go now, will i be saved myself?”
Its hard to see for sure what you are talking about from what you have written, but if it is what I think it is, two of my sisters have gone through the same thing, so I (kind of) know how hard it can be. We will keep you in our prayers, but if you ever want to chat (in confidence) or need advice feel free to email me at: oceanofserenity at hotmail dot com.
Peace
Joshua